Communication, defunct or just defun?

 There are many ways to communicate and everyone seems to have their prefered method. In the present times there is no excuse for a lack of communication, not with Facebook, Twitter, texting, cell phones, land lines, email, instant message, snail mail, and countless other methods of getting your point across. So, why is it that some people have such a hard time communicating if all these methods are available to them? This question has plagued many not only in our times, but as far back as the stone age.

According to Webster’s online dictionary, the word communication can be traced back to the 14th century and means the process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behaviors. This seemingly would include an online sim league, even though those did not exist in the 14th century. I do believe however, that if say Joan of Arc offered Richard II a trade in their simulation league, the King would most definately have a servant respond with his decree.

How does one expect a certain outcome if his or her wishes are not fully expressed? It seems logical to assume that if you want a conversation to take place on a certain subject and go out of your way to make that conversation happen, that continued effort must take place on your part. In short, your work is not done by saying, hello.

We should all get up tomorrow morning and blog about how we will become better communicators, then put the plan into action. There is no ribbon to wear or charity in which to donate money, but lack of communication is a serious matter. I implore everyone who reads this article to call someone, write a note, or just grunt at a fellow employee today. Do something that shows we as a civilization have not given up on talking to each other, and one day when you decide to call, there will be a voice waiting for you on the other end. How cool is that?

Celebrity Sex Tapes

It seems like everyday I hear about some celebrity having a sex tape. There now seems to be an almost CD like atmosphere surrounding these tapes. Hey, you hear about the Carmen Elecktra sex tape? It drops this November 28th. It is almost always celebrities that need to keep themselves in the news because, well, they just aren’t very good at acting. How come the stars I want to see in sex tapes never have them? I mean a Betty White sex tape or a Dolly Parton would turn the industry on its side. Can you imagine the google hits an Oprah sex tape would garner? I can’t even count that high.

I made a sex tape once. There I was right on screen doing my thing except one thing, I looked awful. My God, do I really look like that? I deleted that thing faster than a Kenyan running a marathon. It wasn’t a pretty picture.  It did get me to work out a bit more so not all was lost.  So, while I await word on the release of the Kenny G/Ann Curry sex tape I will keep working on my own body. You never know when you may need to put one of these together to better your career and I want to be ready when that time comes.

Anybody own a green screen?

Random September TV Watching

There are some of you out there that are addicted to certain shows and have to be in front of the TV when they come on, or the world may come to an end. I am not one of those people but there are some shows out there worth making time for and here is my short list.

Shark Tank

This is a new show that I have decided to sink my teeth into and it hasn’t disappointed in my opinion. There are plenty of awkward moments as bad business people get ripped apart before your very eyes. It also has those moments where you catch yourself yelling at the TV begging for the person to take the offer only to see them crash and burn. This past week there was a guy who came in and took the sharks by storm. I wish I knew his name off-hand but if anyone saw it they know exactly who I am speaking about. This guy went toe to toe with every person in the room and came out a winner. Great TV. I think this show has a decent life span in front of it and I will be one of those watching each week.

Biggest Loser

I will admit that this pick has some sappy moments and those little kitchen tips turned mini commercials are kind of annoying, but the show has legs. It is widely popular for a reason and makes for some great TV. I personally love the stories each of these people have and how they must battle themselves to overcome their weight issues. It seems recently the show has gotten away from the “game play” aspect with contestants caring about each other rather than just getting a payday. It is nice to see but we all know we love to see people get stabbed in the back. This season I am pulling for team orange with the dude from last season. I love the fight that kid shows each week! The Biggest Loser will be running until someone decides to pull the plug because I can’t imagine the ratings ever dropping on this giant success.

Office

A great show with the perfect cast for this sort of comedy. I know some people that just don’t get this show and to me that is what makes this one great. You don’t watch this and say it was just OK. You either totally love it or aren’t into it at all. In writing that is hard to accomplish and still be a huge success. Steve Carell is a genius pure and simple. He is the master of making the uncomfortable moment laugh out loud funny. How many times have you sat there with an uncomfortable feeling watching him interact only to burst out laughing? Great acting! You take all this and sprinkle in some Dwight Shrute and you got yourself a major hit on your hands.

So, these are the three things I am into right now besides watching an inappropriate amount of football games. I am sure there are other great shows on but I am a Sagittarius, so focusing my attention is kind of a sore spot for me. If I sit down long enough to get hooked on something else you all will be the first to know about it.

2009 NFL Prison Team – Offense

It has been a bit since I have had free time to write anything so thought why not come back strong. Also, with NFL football right around the corner this seemed appropriate. Without further ado, here is my 2009 NFL prison team. The selection process was tough as their were so many candidates but in the end I think I have put together the best team possible. The only requirements to make this team were the person had to be doing hard time or at some point was in the joint. I also, for sake of time, went with more recent dead beats rather than going back too far into the NFL history.

QB Michael Vick -You can dog him all you want but the guy has a big time arm. The one knock could be experince but now he has the federal seasoning that could make him great.

WR Rae Carruth -No stranger to the run-and-gun style offense, Rae will be used to spread out the defense. He is small in stature, could fit in a trunk of a car if needed, but he has great hands and lightning quick speed.

WR Plaxico Burress-He is just the shot in the leg this offense needs and will be the center piece of a very dangerous passing offense. In the three receiver sets he will be quite the concealed weapon for Vick to utilize.

WR Donte Stallworth-Donte will run down any ball thrown his way and will be murder on those corner backs trying to cover him man to man.

RB Travis Henry-He can run pretty hard and pick up those tough yards but also can finance your illegal drug operation. He is multi-talented both on and off the field and worthy of the starting nod.

TE Jerramy Stevens-A big target who can run through people like a car running at full speed into a nursing home. He has nice hands and displays decent route running for a big man.

OL Daniel Villa-Selected for both his ability to block on coming blitzes and knack for bringing in the teenage crowd.

OL Nate Newton-Big Nate can flatten linebackers with ease and nobody can out lift him in the gym. He routinely lifts 213 lbs in and out of his trunk.

OL Chester Pitts-Chester is very nimble and excels at  getting out to block for his running back on sweeps. He will run down field if left unattended.

OL JD Quinn-An undrafted rookie with M.A.D.D. skills. He has nice footwork and his dedication to practice really sets the bar high.

Hard time ain't easy.

Hard time ain't easy.

Dwayne Bowe poised for breakout year.

If your like me than your likely pouring over all the fantasy football info you can get your hands on right now. This may or may not help you. My WR pick for a breakout season is none other than Chiefs wideout Dwayne Bowe. He isn’t a sleeper pick or anything, so you won’t be tricking anyone come draft time. However, if you can nab him a few spots earlier than others have him, it will benefit you.

Bowe has several things going in his favor this year. The first thing is he started off the pre-season in coach Haley’s dog house and has been working his butt off trying to get out. He is more focused. There is also the 3rd year fantasy football receiver rule. This basically has been proved over time to be when receivers seem to “get it” and bust out in a big way. It surely isn’t a lock but it is more dependable than say the weather report.

Finally, I think the most important is Bowe will have Matt Cassel throwing him the football which will be an improvement over the QB carousel the Chiefs have been employing as of late. In 2007, his rookie year, Dwayne caught 70 balls for 995 yards with 5 TD’s. Last season he improved, with suspect QB play most often, and was able to catch 86 balls for 1022 yards with 7 TD’s. My prediction for the 2009 season is 95 catches, 1100 yards, and 10 TD’s. This is studly territory for a receiver and definitely someone you want to have in your starting lineup-not playing against you!

Good luck!

Studly in 2009!

Studly in 2009!

Never bend over for the soap.

I just read that Plaxico Burress has hired a prison consultant in order to ready himself for his time in prison. Also, CBS Sportsline reports that, “Consultants are popular among celebrities and other high-profile people facing incarceration”.How is this a job? Also, is it not a sad commentary of our times that this many celebrities need prison consultation? What does your resume have to look like to get this job? I see an interview kind of going like this;

I see you have eight prior arrests.

Yes sir.

I also see that half were felonies, very nice.

Thank you.

Were you ever assaulted while behind bars?

Oh yes, many times sir.

I like your style. Congratulations, your hired.

So, basically your job is to tell Plaxico that he is likely to get bent come shower time and that he should never look people in the eyes. Oh, and the shifty looking guard will get you cigs if you sign autographs and stuff. Prison sucks, end of story. Don’t go around shooting off guns if you don’t want to end up there. Celebrities should get consultants on how to keep them out of prison instead of waiting until it is too late.

Cutting license plates.

Cutting license plates.

Tonights Random T.V. Watching

It was all sports watching tonight for me and I kicked it off with a little Redsox versus Yankees. The Yankees came into this series feeling very confident, winning 15 of their last 18 games, and that confidence was evident as they treated Brad Penny like a pinata. Hideki Matsui went yard twice and both were of the three run variety which is a sure way to bust the other team in the chops. The Redsox offense did throw up double digits which was good to see but when your pitching is getting lit up like Clark Griswald’s house at Christmas time, it tends to get lost in the shuffle. An exciting game to watch but with my Cardinals on deck against the Padres it was time to switch gears.

Kyle Lohse went tonight for the Redbirds and lefty Clayton Richard toed the rubber for the Padres. One thing stuck out to me while watching this game and that was the poise of this kid Clayton. He works quick and shows no fear out there on the hill. I like him a lot despite him 5 hitting my team. I think he has like two years experience in the big leagues but this kid could turn into a very nice pitcher at some point. He was part of the big Jake Peavy deal and if he develops into a consistent starter could make that trade look real nice for San Diego. As it stands right now the Nick Hundley homer is the game winner-Cards just aren’t hitting tonight!

While watching to see if the Cardinals can come back somehow, I have been switching over to the Vikings and Chiefs preseason game. I am a big fan of the Chiefs but also wanted to check out Brett Farve in purple. He looked like he fit right in if you ask me. The Minnesota fans seemed pumped to have him on the team I know that much. On the field he just didn’t click with his wideouts but I have no doubts that will come along before too long. I for one think it is good to have him back in the NFL. My Chiefs looked pretty good this time out and Cassell began to show his skills. We did not run the ball well at all, but, who does against Minnesota. Their run defense is just sick. It doesn’t help that Larry Johnson looks to me like someone running in wet cement. I am not going to be one of those guys who says Super Bowl for his team even when it is obvious that isn’t going to happen. However, I am comfortable saying that Matt Cassell makes this a better football team. We still need pieces but it seems headed in the right direction instead of no direction like when Herm Edwards was running the show.

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